“So you’re a mediator? Working with Ukrainian refugees? And what is it that you do?”

Let me explain. According to Christopher Moore, one of the “giants” in the world of mediation, a mediator “intervenes in a conflict or dispute to assist involved parties to improve their relationships, enhance communications, and use effective problem-solving and negotiation procedures to reach voluntary and mutually acceptable understandings or agreements on contested issues.” (Moore 2014). Of course, apart from the “general mediation techniques”, all mediators bring their own approaches, backgrounds and preferences, and so do I.

One of my preferences is connected to my original education as a literary scientist, which I took before my mediation studies: I continue to be fond of stories, of personal narratives. Mediation is all about stories, the first thing a mediator will do is listen to the different perspectives of the parties, how they look at the issue. Yet, there is more than the direct personal perspectives – a mediator also needs to be able to shift between the “concrete”, day-to-day level, and the meta-level, which is for instance addressed in “narrative mediation”. In their 2012 book “When Stories Clash” Monk & Winslade describe some cases where the mediator supports the parties involved to explore their “stories”, and to try and look forward to develop a joint future story to which all parties will be able and willing to contribute. It helps if the parties are able to listen to each other’s stories, and come to understand each other’s perspective. This is one of my goals during the mediation process. For this the parties of course need to feel safe enough to meet for a joint conversation.

Having some general understanding of the context of the parties contributes to positive outcomes of mediation, and this is why I have decided to offer my mediation and de-escalation services to municipalities accommodating Ukrainian refugees. Not only do I come with knowledge of their country of origin, I am also able to conduct the mediation process in a familiar language.